Tuesday, March 15, 2011

First Ultrasound

I had my first ever ultrasound today.  Honestly it was depressing.

When we think ultrasound, we think of the one during the first trimester of pregnancy.  It's an exciting time.  The U/S is the first time you get to "see" your baby.  It's so magical.

My experience was far from magical.  The place I went to seemed nice, I just wasn't in a happy mood.  I was in the waiting room with another women my age.  She stared at me the whole time, I tried not to make eye contact.  A few minutes later a nurse came out to congratulate her.  I couldn't help but think that maybe she was thinking I was just like her.  :/

Another FaceBook contact announced she is pregnant this week.  I said my fake congrats.  But since there has been several posts a day about morning sickness, maternity clothes and other pregnancy related things.  I understand she is excited but... Anyways her first U/S was today also.  The comment that upset me most was "I am hoping to have a picture to share".

I didn't get to look at the screen, I didn't get a photo to bring home.  It's not like I knew what I'd be looking at anyways.  I felt distanced, saddened and alone.  Let's just say this is not what I imagined.

On a positive note, I should get a call from my GYN in a few days with the results.  I'm hoping to look normal inside, or at least fixable.  And I really can fit 32oz of water somewhere in my body at one time.

3 comments:

  1. I hope one day very soon you'll be able to post about a "magical" ultrasound. In the meantime...hang in there.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Thanks! I'm in a little less depressing mood today. :)

    ReplyDelete
  3. I'm so sorry :( Hide that friend--you don't need that constant reminder.

    ReplyDelete

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