I go to the gym a lot. Not as much as I would like to with work, everything around the house and just being exhausted. But more than the average person. I fear my PCOS will cause me to gain too much weight. I fear the injections they want to put me on in the future will also cause me to gain weight. I fear that if I do get pregnant I'll blow up and be fat long after the baby is born. These are all common fears. Well maybe not the first two because 90% of women (if not more) don't know what PCOS is or stick needles in their stomach to begin with.
I want to be skinny. I feel most of the pressure from my own father. He was never tolerant of obesity. Even made fun of people in public. I'm sure my own mother fell victim to this because all my life she gained and lost weight very quickly. We are the same height, when I was 14 she was proud to admit she weighed less than myself. I was as skinny kid, probably only weighing 100lbs. at the time. (Even in high school I wasn't able to donate blood because I didn't met the 110lbs. weight requirement.) She had to be only 80 or 90lbs. at the time. Even looking back on the photos she was so tiny. These days she isn't skinny but mentions exercising a lot and only eating a banana for the whole day. Silly stuff like that. My father mentioned one day I, too, was getting fat. I don't want to be fat... or made fun of. I'll drag my infertile self to the gym.
I think pregnancy bumps are adorable. I wish I had one to rub and buy maternity clothes for. To paint, do those belly casts for, and whatever else they do now in pregnancy. And I want to take tons of pictures of mine, one each week, maybe even each day. However, there is no bump for me. If there is no bump then I want to opposite, flat, tiny stomach. It has to be one or the other.
I do cardio for 30 minutes. Sometimes longer if there is something good on the TV. (I don't have cable at home, the gym is the only place I watch TV.) Then I lift weights. I finally got around to writing down what I lift. I know I increase in weight over time, but wanted to make note of how much. Then decided to just make a blog post out of it.
About Me:
- Age: 27 years old
- Gender: Female Obviously
- Height: 5'1" Convert to m
- Weight: 150 lbs. Convert to kg
- BMI: 28.91 Overweight, right below Obese
- Waist to Hip: .78 Healthy
- Body Fat: 27.08% Acceptable, between Fitness or Obese
Measurements:
- Waist: 32"
- Belly Button: 33"
- Hips: 41"
- Bust: 39"
- Upper Arm: 12"
- Neck: 13.5"
- Thighs: 26"
- Calves: 15"
- Wrist: 6"
- Forearm: 9.5"
And then there is the gym...
Legs (my strongest part):
- Calf Extension - 270 lbs.
- Back Extension - 170 lbs.
- Seated Leg Press - 180 lbs.
- Glute - 90 lbs.
- Hip Adduction - 110 lbs.
- Hip Abduction - 210 lbs.
Abs (decent):
- Abdominal - 60 lbs.
- Torso Rotation - 90 lbs.
Arms (toothpicks):
- Pulldown - 70 lbs
- Row/Rear Deltoid - 60 lbs.
- Shoulder Press - 35 lbs.
- Biceps Curl - 40 lbs.
- Triceps Press - 70 lbs.
I have a lot of muscle. Probably because I do have PCOS. I hear women tend to be more muscular due to extra testosterone, although that is one thing I don't think they ever tested me for.
I'm far from skinny, the BMI tells me I'm almost obese.
My arms are still fat at the top. I wish they were smaller. A little less wiggles. But still better than they were in the past.
I really like my boobs. They can stay.
The ass can stay too. Though I wish it was Photoshop smoother.
My legs are super strong. The calves are all muscle, they don't wiggle at all. I wish I had cute high heal legs. There are even boots I can't wear because my calves are so big. Top legs are much harder than in the past, but still have a little wiggle to them. They need more work.
At least my stomach is flat now. I touch it a lot. During the day I run my hands over it. It even sinks in a little after my rib cage. And everything under it is hard. Still a little bit of wiggle on the outside though.
-Selbe
You're beautiful!
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